◾️ Refuge

Here I am, in my wood shop – my refuge. I think about how I might lift my spirits in the midst of the turmoils of the world. Just being here helps me forget my troubles for a short while. As disordered as it may be, I do my best thinking and my best work when I am feeling low.

Inspiration seeks refuge in the quiet

Almost always, being creative works for me. That could be cooking, sewing and pattern making, drawing and, of course, woodworking.

I use my tools and they undergo transformation. So do I. We go through many microscopic changes, barely detectible but influential nonetheless. My brain, my hands, my body, and even that funky atttitude toward life changes for better or worse.

Giving myself permission to express sorrow and acknowledge pain is beneficial to my brain. From time to time, I lament lost opportunities, lost loves, even a lost project. The quiet of my shop serves as refuge in my search to find answers to those “why” questions in my life.

Can I avoid suffering? No. Years ago, I attended a lecture by His Holiness the Dalai Lama.

My desire was to observe him in the midst of the thousands of people who came to see him. They, including myself, sought guidance regarding non-violence and suffering. He is the mirror and reflection of us all: good or bad, righteous or self-righteous and everything else.

Yes, each of us is the answer. But only if we want to be. To accept that requires honesty and the courage to stop looking everywhere else but within our minds.

Enlightening? Yes. Helpful? Of course.

Do I still have questions about suffering? I do. But I know that is the point. I can’t avoid it. We can’t avoid it. But mindful engagement, a positive attitude, and a willingness to seek the way through helps. There were no really big revelations or answers. I think that may be the point.

When I deal with the question in my shop, a glance at a piece of walnut or pecan or hickory reminds me that I need to make a replacement handle for an old tool. Do I permit myself to recognize that reminder as an amusing gift in the midst of all things serious? I most certainly do.

Mindfulness as refuge

I believe that a strong mind helps release energy and dampen sadness. It generates consolation and self-care.

It keeps me focused on the fact that any problem I have today, as I had yesterday, will pass.

Once in a great while, I nick myself on the bench. I wasn’t paying attention. Yeah, I got nicked. You know how it happens: my mind wandered for a very brief unregistered moment. My work got a bit sloppy and I knew it. Instead of a rest, I kept “working”…

Next, an accidental slip!

Then, I remember that split second of prescient awareness when I knew – just knew – I was going to draw blood!

Most likely my attention was on something that exists outside of the shop. I am in the shop, true, but my mind for a moment was not. Now, I must bring it back and align it with my hands, my body, and my tools.

The pain from that completely avoidable injury serves as a reminder to stay in the present moment. So, I redirect my attention to the sawing, the planing, the sanding, and the finishing of my project. In other words, the work at hand.

When my mind wanders, I gently coax it back to the bench.

I am by no means saying that spending time in the shop cures every worry in my mind, but it provides much refuge for me and lightens my burden.

If that doesn’t take hold, I reach into my “soul” box to:

• let it go, if I can,
• walk in nature – never know who you might meet, 🐞
• self-reflect,
• exercise,
• breathe deeply.

All of this can happen in one place:

If those tools don’t work, I reassure myself that in a few hours the day will be done. How do I know that? Um, yesterday?

Time should never be rushed! I do not cross any day, good or bad, off the calendar even a minute before midnight! Let tomorrow get here on its own.

🐞

Tomorrow, the bad feeling, the worry and fear will look different.

The future enters into us, in order to transform itself in us, long before it happens.

Let life happen to you. Believe me: life is in the right, always.

– Rainer Maria Rilke 

Above all, I accept refuge, not as a hiding place, but as a soul sanctuary.

♥️ Shirley J

For all women who have served in the military: if you need help, click here.

♥️